Hello My Shadow
by Marron
Summary: Riku finds himself wandering in the darkness. Songfic and a RikuSora slash... yay


Hello My Shadow  
  
Ok, my first Kingdom Hearts story... fiction... whatever. This is a one-sided pairing Riku/Sora. The song is called Hello by Evanescence. I don't own Kingdom Hears; it belongs to Disney and Square Soft. Review, don't review; it's up to you really. Enjoy  
  
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He stood there behind the door watching it close in front of him, unsure if he would ever see the outside again. Unsure if he would see the teen on the other side again.  
  
"Take care of her..." He smiled slightly and said his silent goodbye. Once the door had closed he turned to see the mouse king standing along side of him, smiling at him.  
  
"Don't worry Riku. Remember what I said to Sora, there will always be a door to the light."  
  
"I don't deserve to belong in the light... not after what I did. I hurt him. This is for the best." He turned away from the king and began walking down the lonely dark road. "Is this all that's left for me? Eternal solitude? At least he has her... the princess of heart. Something I may never have again. A heart." He sighed and continued walking down the road for sometime before stopping.  
  
"Sora... Kairi... I'm sorry. Is this the world of death?" He hung his head and flickered as if he was just an illusion. He clutched his chest and stumbled. "No... I can't disappear yet. Not until I see them again."  
  
"Riku, can you hear me?" He lifted his head slightly looking to see where the voice came from. "I'll be there soon."  
  
"Who's there?" He turned around only to find the darkness there.  
  
"I've been talking to you the whole time. But my words were hindered by the darkness covering your heart."  
  
"What..."  
  
"Another keyblade... I've gotten the keyblade for this side."  
  
"I don't know who you are, but... what's happening to me...?"  
  
"Your hart has over come the darkness. But you can't take back your body. So only your heart was left behind. In this dark side where stolen hearts are gathered."  
  
"What should I do?" He turned to face the road yet to be traveled.  
  
"The door of darkness that is soon going to appear... That door, through which we can not pass... In order to close it... Two keyblades and two hearts are needed. Perhaps you too, like me, came here for that purpose. Maybe it was fate."  
  
"Fate... You know everything, don't you? If that's so, I want you to tell me one more thing... Are Sora and Kairi safe?"  
  
"You your self should be able to feel their hearts." He looked up to see Sora running to him. "How you perceive your friends... Is dependent on your heart." Sora was close to him, smiling at him. He opened his eyes, imagining Sora had been there. He relaxed and felt more at ease.  
  
"Thank you." He continued down the dark road remembering what the voice had said to him. "Fate... Am I really here because of fate? If that's true... Maybe I will see him again.  
  
"But then again... I don't have my body... What would I look like? Would he even know it was me? And her... she must hate me for what I did. And the other princesses as well. I shouldn't go back... I can't go back. I've caused so much pain for everyone. I should stay on this side. It will do everyone good." He stopped again, letting the tears he had been fighting fall to the ground.  
  
"Gods... what have I done?" Sinking to the ground, he slammed his hand on the cold road and continued to let the tears fall silently. "I bet that was my own damned head saying all of those hopeful words..." He thought back to his time on the island wishing he had never said he wanted to leave. All the fun he had had there. And his face.  
  
Riku had never really cared for Kairi in the way everyone had though he did. It was just a façade. The person he had cared for all along had been his best friend. Sora. The one thing he would never be able to have. Sora had fallen for Kairi. And like wise, Kairi for Sora. It was right. It fit. Boy love girl, girl loves boy. Riku was not the one Sora would someday hold. He was not the one he would share the paopu with... That's right the stupid fruit with that stupid legend.  
  
"When two people share it... their destinies become intertwined for ever... Ha... I wish. Sora's a normal logical guy... well he's sort of logical. But he is enough so to like a girl, not me. And besides I nearly killed the both of them." He sat there and remembered his friend's face at his last words.  
  
"He looked shocked and determined. Like... He wanted to make me proud. But there was something in his eyes then. It was almost as if he didn't want me to say that. Oh who am I kidding? Wishful thinking on my part, major wishful thinking none the less." He stood up and brushed himself clean of any dirt.  
  
He started to walk again. Hoping to find said door to darkness soon...  
  
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He had wandered for what seemed to be forever. A year he figured. He had slept enough to warrant a year. Now his vision had become strained. No longer could he see the road he walked upon or any trace of light that did manage to linger in the world. He no longer saw the heartless that would follow him and wait for him to stumble or lag. He knew they where there. He could feel the cold grip around him when he would sleep. He, Riku had become blind.  
  
After walking awhile on day 350 he called it, he was stopped by something. It was small and warm. And by the feel of it had very large circles atop its head. He strained to remember if he had once seen such a creature. He did, he had met just such a creature. In fact it had been a king... what was the name it had gone by again...  
  
"King Mickey?"  
  
"Yes Riku?" He remembered... the king had remembered his name and here he had be straining to remember the mouse king's name.  
  
"Where am I? I can't see anything... Am I still in Kingdom Hearts?"  
  
"Yes you are. You remembered... Even after everything that tried to tempt you."  
  
"Tempt me? I wasn't tempted... Not that I'm aware of anyway."  
  
"The darkness Riku. It was calling to you again. It wants you back. He wants you back. Back with him as his puppet. Ansem calls out to you every day, every night."  
  
"But how... Sora rid me of him..." He stopped and looked down to the ground in shame. "He saved me from myself. How pathetic."  
  
"Don't say that. It's not and you're not. I found it Riku... I found the door. All we need is your keyblade."  
  
"But I don't have one. Sora has it... It was taken from me."  
  
"That's where you are wrong my friend" He called him friend, something he had not been called in so long.  
  
"I don't understand."  
  
"It's in your heart. You've had it all along. All you need to do is think of the one thing that your heart wants more than anything. What you live for. What is your duty to protect...?"  
  
"Sora. I live for him. I live for his happiness." He looked up and smiled slightly in the direction he though the king was standing.  
  
"Then you should feel it. But it might not be ready for you to summon it so don't worry. Together we can open this door and go home."  
  
"I can't go back there! Not after everything I did... I'm glad my body was taken from me, now I really can't go back." He turned around and started to walk away, but the king reached out and grabbed his cloak... His cloak? Since when did he have one of those? "Hey let me go!"  
  
"And you said you didn't have a body... Would I be able to grab on to your cloak if you didn't have a body?"  
  
"Well... no... And since when do I have a cloak? I didn't have this before." He tugged at the sleeves and patted around his stomach.  
  
"Since I don't know. But you have them both now so be happy. Now sit tight! This door is getting opened!" He heard the sing-song tone the king had used and sighed remembering how Sora had used that on him at times.  
  
"I wonder if you've changed..." He laughed to himself silently. Then he felt something cold on his face. Like a hand, but it was so small...  
  
"Riku? Riku...? Come on there's someone here... Riku?!" The king hadn't seen his companion fall, nor did he see the little heartless with big glowing golden eyes watching him from the shadows. "Sora?!" The little heartless kissed Riku's cheek again and disappeared into the darkness. "A heartless... but it looked so much like Sora..."  
  
"Do you need a hand king?" Stormy eyes looked down at the fallen teen before moving back to the king.  
  
"Yes please... thank you Leon... This is Hallow Bastion I presume?"  
  
"You presume correctly." Leon had gone to pick Riku up and carry him to the castle. "Is he going to be an ass when he wakes up? From all Sora said... He can be a grumpy person."  
  
"So you have had contact with him? That's good. I was getting worried."  
  
"You know, Sora's been looking for both of you. More him then you actually." Leon lifted the sleeping teen slightly to show the king what he meant. "He's worried sick about this kid for some reason. It's been a year and blah blah blah." The king laughed at Leon's sudden complaint.  
  
"I think you're worried about him too. After all who would have thought that Sora would have become what he is now. He's grown so much. And Riku... still believes in him." He smiled at the taller man and began walking to the castle.  
  
"Sora's here you know... He's talking a much needed rest. Cid dragged him here. Quite the sight." Leon carried the sleeping teen in his arms to the castle before stopping. "I wonder... What could keep someone like him searching all this time? Faith? Hope? Or is it love? Well, we'll find out soon enough." The king had opened the door for him and shut it behind him after following Leon in, he looked around.  
  
"I haven't been here in years. It still looks well kept. Ansem took care of it, but you have taken better care."  
  
"Yeah, blame that on Yuffie and Aerith. Neat freaks... Well at least Yuffie is now." He carried Riku to a room near the library and put him on the bed. "I'll go get Sora then..." And with that he quickly walked off.  
  
"Don't worry, the light will be here soon Riku. You've suffered long enough." The king sat across the room and waited knowing if Sora was coming that would mean Goofy and Donald would be as well.  
  
"What's the big idea Leon? Can't you just tell me? Not carry me by my jacket?!" Before the king could ask what the commotion was a brown, tan and black ball was tossed from the door.  
  
"No, get over it. King Mickey, come with me please." Leon led the king out and closed the door tightly behind him.  
  
"Ow jerk... who does he think he is...? Who's this?" Sora got up and walked to the sleeping figure on the bed. "Riku..."  
  
"Sora? Is that you? Please say it is... I can't see you..." Riku sat up and moved his head as if he were looking around.  
  
"It is. Well of course you can't see me you dumb dumb! You have a blindfold on!" He reached and began to pull it off before Riku grabbed his wrist and pushed him away.  
  
"Don't take it off. Please..." He got off the bed and slowly made his way over to his friend.  
  
"Riku? Are you ok? Because I can call Aer... oof" Riku had made contact in the form of a hug. Sora smiled to himself and returned the hug. "I missed you."  
  
"I missed you more... after all I went blind thinking of you and Kairi so much." He laughed, it was a soft laugh but it was enough for his friend.  
  
"Fine you win this one Riku! But just you wait!" He leaned up and kissed him as if it was the most natural thing for him in the world. "I win..."  
  
"Sora? But what about Kairi..." It wasn't that he didn't mind his friend's kiss it was the fact that somewhere there was a girl in love with said friend.  
  
"She's not here. And she's not my girlfriend. So there. Besides... I though I should give my best friend his first kiss!"  
  
"Sora don't do this to me. I don't like you playing with me." He had backed away from the warmth of his friend and turned his head away as if he was looking away in shame.  
  
"But Riku... I love you... I did what you said! I took care of Kairi! I sent her back home! Isn't that what you meant...?"  
  
"Did you say... Did you just say 'I love you' to me?"  
  
"Uh yeah... What did you think I said? I loath you?" But before he could speak again Riku had his lips on his "..."  
  
"I love you too Sora." He smiled and took off the blindfold reveling his dulled aqua eyes. "I really do."  
  
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Riku woke up with a start. "Was that real?" He looked around only to see darkness and the road that seemed to go on forever. Sitting up he sighed sadly and pulled something small from his pocket.  
  
"Playground school bell rings again  
  
Rain clouds come to play again  
  
Has no one told you she's not breathing?  
  
Hello I'm your mind giving you someone to talk to  
  
Hello  
  
"If I smile and don't believe  
  
Soon I know I'll wake from this dream  
  
Don't try to fix me I'm not broken  
  
Hello I'm the lie living for you so you can hide  
  
Don't cry  
  
"Suddenly I know I'm not sleeping  
  
Hello I'm still here  
  
All that's left of yesterday"  
  
He let the paper slip from his hand and pulled one of his arm bands off reveling numerous scars running across his wrist. "Damn darkness... Well I might make it this time..." He smiled to himself and took a small pocket knife he had had since his days on Destiny Islands. Taking in a deep breath he repeated what had been stopped so many times before. He watched as the blood dropped on the paper mixing with the words. After watching his blood flow he lied down next to the growing puddle and looked at the paper one last time. "I'm so sorry... Sora."  
  
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There we go. Yeah... Riku's dead. I killed him. Poor kid... He doesn't stand a chance when I'm depressed. Well yeah, that was it! Done poof! Bye bye! Like I said before, review if you want. Hope you er liked it? Oh one more note, I got the talk with Riku talking to the uh air from The Ansem Report- www.ansemreport.com Go there and be merry! And a big thanks goes out to Lindsay and Fallon my beloved beta readers! 


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